Update on the imfamous fence

Fence construction continued on Saturday the 18th. However, between Monday the 13th and Friday the 17th, our "No Trespassing, No Climbing the Fence" sign was ripped off the chain link. Toni was HOTTTTTT!!!! We contemplated calling the sheriff's office but I wasn't sure what they could do. Toni put the sign back up using a hole puncher. A little ghetto yes but I think it drove the point home because even though the privacy fence is up, the sign remains on the chain link.

While putting up the fence, we caught Sassy on camera climbing the chain link!!! WooHoo. In process of climbing, I told her she shouldn't be climbing the fence. She looked at me and shrugged. I wanted to rip into her but she isn't my daughter. She went back over the fence while Toni was outside and Toni told her the same thing. Sassy went to tell the older couple that live next her (I'm not sure the relation). I assumed they told her to just climb their back fence to get to our neighbor's yard because that is what she did. We wanted her to do that all along!!!! I guess she just didn't get it. After playing with the neighbor's children, Sassy returned to her yard by climbing OUR fence AGAIN!!! I mean seriously!! What is there not to get?? I told her again not to climb our fence. She replied as any sassy child would, " my mom said this is our fence and she has proof." I said, "great, then I want to see it." She said, "my mom and dad aren't home." WHAT KIND OF PARENTS LEAVE THEIR 7-8 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER HOME ALONE?????? I said, "I am not talking to you about this anymore. I will just speak to your mom when she gets home." Nothing ever came of that because I am sure if Meany had "proof" the fence was hers she would have most definitely stomped her crazy butt over to us and showed the proof. I know I would have.

We finished constructing the fence with no issues. While putting up the last panel, Meany was outside and said something really loud. I wasn't sure if she was talking to me so I said "Excuse me," politely I might add. She said, "The fence looks nice." I was in complete shock but responded, "Thank you." I am not sure if it was sincere but with the problems we have had I wouldn't be surprised if she is up to something. It has been 5 days since construction was completed and nothing has surfaced. Let's hope nothing does. I got my way and that is all that matters. hahahaha Sweet victory.

Mean Neighbors

It all started approximately 1 year ago when our dog Lexi decided she wanted to play with our neighbors children. The neighbors I am referring to live behind us. While the children were jumping on their trampoline, Lexi climbed the fence and was barking at them. The mother of the children (I don't know her name so I will call her Meany) came over to the house in scrubs and no shoes (imagine that) and knocked on the window (strange!). Meany told Toni that Lexi "trapped her children on the trampoline" and "trapped her in her own backyard" and "they were all in fear of their lives."

Let me explain a little bit about Lexi. She is approximately 2 1/2 years old. She weighs about 65 pounds. She reminds me of Dory from "Finding Nemo". She is VERY forgetful and barks at everything. If Toni and I leave the room and come back in a few seconds, she barks at us. I am assuming she is saying something like "Oh hi. Who are you? My name is Lexi. Nice to meet you." I believe she is scared of everything. Her bark is quite intimidating but not really because she walks AWAY from you while barking, not towards you. Once you pet her she stops barking and is VERY lovey dovey.

Now back to Meany...she told Toni all of the crap mentioned previously. Toni responded with a nice thank you and that we would take care of the situation. Since that moment, Lexi has not been left unattended in the backyard. Not 30 minutes later, Animal Control showed up. The officer gave us a warning for "Dog at Large." Not only did Meany tell us about Lexi, she called Animal Control!!!! Un-freaking-believable. Two days later we got another knock on the door and it was Animal Control AGAIN. The officer said that Meany said Lexi climbed the fence. I told the officer that that was impossible because Lexi has not been unsupervised. The officer said that Meany signed the paperwork saying that her statement was true so if we wanted to take her to court and fight it we could. We decided to just pay the $30 ticket instead of hundreds of dollars on court costs. I installed an electrical fence approximately 1 1/2 feet from the chain link so Lexi will not even go close to the fence. Apparently it worked because Meany has not called Animal Control since then.

Approximately 3-4 months ago Meany's dog was in our yard just hanging out. Toni and I took the dog back to her house without calling animal control because we are nice people. We gave the dog to her daughter. Stay tuned for more to come on this subject.

On to Meany's daughter (we will call her Sassy). Sassy constantly climbs the back fence to cross into Levvie's yard to play with his grandson. Levvie is our neighbor to the left. (We know his name because he is nice.) Sassy crosses the fence diagnally. She has done this so much that the bars on top of the chain link are bending. We asked her to stop climbing the fence because she is damaging it and she could fall and get hurt. We have asked Meany and her husband to ask her to stop climbing the fence for the same reasons. Sadie, our red-nosed pitbull, is in the back yard and could one day decide she doesn't like Sassy and bite her if she falls into the yard. Although Sadie is a very sweet dog, she is a dog and dog's are animals and animals can be unpredictable.

Sassy continues to climb the fence even after multiple attempts to stop the behavior. Toni and I put up a sign on the fence that reads "No Trespassing, No Climbing on the fence." We also installed a lock on the gate that joins our backyards (the people that lived our house and her house were friends in the 70's when the fence was installed). Sassy continues to climb the fence. You will find out later why she still does this.

Two weeks ago, I unplugged the electrical fence and removed the poles and stuck them in the top of the chain link so that I could mow along the fence line without getting the wire caught in the mower blade. The stakes have a small spike on the end so they are easy to insert into the ground. The day after I mowed, the stakes remained in the fence because I completely forgot to reinsert them into the ground. Instead of Meany asking us to remove the stakes from the the top of the fence she called the Sheriff department. Don't you love your tax dollars going to such ridiculous things? I know I do. The officier asked us who the fence belonged to and I said us. I assumed he was talking about the chain link fence. He said Meany said the chain link belonged to her. She said her father in law put the fence up in the 70's when in fact the people that owned my house in the 70's put the fence up when the pool was in stalled in '75. The officer said that I was not allowed to put metal spikes on a fence. I had no idea what he was talking about. He said that if anyone gets hurt by the spikes that it could be a lawsuit. I still didn't know what he was talking about. He was not beng very nice and his voice was quite hasty. He finally pointed to the electrical fence posts. I informed him that I placed them there the day before, temporarily, so I could mow along the fence line. His tone changed entirely and said "Oh so those aren't permantent?" I said, "No sir, I know that you can't have things like that on your fence." He asked if we had trouble with them before and I said yes all of the time. He advised me to put the posts back in the ground as soon as possible so they would stop causing issues. I immediately returned the posts to the ground. I asked him if he could take care of the fence climbing business and he said yes. He also said if Sassy fell into our yard that it would be considered trespassing. WooHoo, I hope she falls.

Now onto the matter of the fence. Toni and I are so fed up with Meany that we decide to put a 6 foot board on board privacy fence inside the back fence line. My cousin Ryan and I prepared to install the first post and Meany storms outside and says that we need a 2 foot gap inbetween "her" fence and our new fence. We stopped construction so that I could research the matter. She said "Tell your worker to stop working." I said, "I will not say that because I am not a mean person." She said, "Yes you are. We have had trouble with you since your dog climbed the fence." I said, "I took care of that didn't I?" She agreed. I told her that I could put up a fence wherever I wanted to because the chain link was mine anyway. She said it was her's because her father in law put it up in the seventies. I disagreed and said that the fence had to be put up before the pool was installed. She said she would call AJ (which was the previous owner of my house) and contact her father in law. I said I would call property appraisers and county code enforcement to figure out if there was a 2 foot rule. She said she would too of course. I offered her the number :).

After about 20 minutes of calling around (of course everything was closed at that point) we reconveined at the back corner. She brought back up, in the form of an older couple (I am assuming either her parents or her in laws). They live next to her. Meany said this fence was put up in 1971 and that pool was built in 1974. I disagreed because property appraisers says the pool was built in 1975 but that was beside the point. Before arguing resumed, Toni chimed in and asked what the problem was and that we were trying to install a privacy fence so we could be done with each other. She didn't have anything to say to that.

I asked why did it matter how far away the new fence was. She said she didn't want it leaning on her fence and damaging it. I said it would be approximately 6 inches from "the" fence and wouldn't touch it. Toni pointed out the bent bar on top of the chain link because Sassy continues to climb the fence. She said, "she keeps climbing it because I told her to." What kind of mother tells her daughter to climb a fence???? Wow. She continued to say that we have had issues with each other since Lexi climbed the fence. I pointed out that that was taken care of. And again she agreed. I brought up the fact that she could have just asked us to take the electrical fence posts down instead of calling the sheriff's office. I continued to tell her that we returned her dog that was in our yard instead of calling Animal control. She said, "not my dog!" I said, "Yes ma'am, ask your daughter." That just goes to show that she has no idea what is going on in her house when she allows her 7 year old daughter to answer the door without knowing. Her mother and father in law didn't say a word the entire time and when we made those points they walked away.

Of course she didn't stop. I said that I was going to call code enforcement first thing in the morning and she of course said she would too. As she walked away she said, "you must think I am an dumb blonde." I replied with, "No ma'am just uneducated." I should have replied with, "you aren't even real blonde." Hahaha, I make myself laugh sometimes.

After much research this fencing dilemma, this is what we found out. My dad called fencing companies and they do not keep records back that far. They said that chain link fence polls are installed on the customer side of the fence. Our chain link has polls on the inside of our fence all the way around (including the back). Meany's fence, however, has poles installed on the inside of her fence line on the sides but not the back because they are installed on OUR side of the fence. What fencing company would install poles on the inside of the fence on the sides but the outside of the fence on the back??? NONE.

The law also states that if the fence is installed on my side of the property line it is my fence and vice versa. It also states that if the fence is installed exactly on the property line that it belongs to both parties because the property line doesn't belong to anybody. My dad said there are metal stakes in the ground on all corners that a strong magnet will be able to find. When those are found the property line issue will no longer be an issue. I contacted code enforcement and they said there is no regulation on how far a new fence needs to be setback from an existing fence. I printed out the regulation from the land development code and posted it on the one post that we installed so she can read it. Needless to say, construction will resume as planned when Ryan and I can get our schedules to match.

If we find out that the chainlink is on the property line, we will request in writing that the pole be repaired since by law, maintaince is the responsibility of both homeowners. If we find out the chain link is on our property line we will request in writing that the pole be repaired and then rip the fence down. :) ahahahahah I just love being right. If she wants to play hardball, I am ready and waiting.

What a freaking day!!!! Tuesday, June 30th

Woke up around 8:30 and gave Braxton and Rylan baths before the vet. Took them to see the doc and Rylan was a crazy mess. She was so difficult. She weighs about 51 pounds but it took all of my strength to keep her in check. Braxton, on the other hand, was a dream. He weighs 82 pounds and just sat there like a good little boy :). He is my favorite. Can you tell? $200 later they were up to date on shots and doggie meds. Rylan wore me out so much I ended up taking a nap for 45 minutes as soon as I got home.

I had a chiropractor appointment at 2pm so Toni decided to go with me. I was having major gas pains so we stopped at the DG (Dollar General) to pick up Gas-X. Anyone that has been to a DG knows there are always a 100 people in the store and 1 stupid register open. Please keep in mind that my appointment was at 2pm on the southside of town and it was already 1:30pm. I pick up the Gas-X and 3 of Polk County's finest are in front of me. The guy that was paying couldn't get his credit card to work. He tried 3 times and finally it went through. While he was cusing at the machine the lady behind him was SCREAMING across the store to her granddaughter "BBBBBRRRIIIAAANNNNNNEEEEE" She did this 4 times before her smarty pants granddaughter finally decided to acknowledge that she was listening. A manager opened another register so the woman directly in front of me went to that register. I stayed put because I knew as soon as I moved to the other register it would suddenly become the longest line. I finally get to the register and my stupid Debit card won't scan!!! I was so pissed. I stormed out to the car and threw the card into the car past Toni (who was driving) and got her card to pay for the Gas X. Ridiculous.

I was 10 minutes late to the chiro. Toni went back with me to see what the dr. did. It was EXTREMELY relaxing. But that didn't matter because of what was about to happen...

The chiro office is on the corner of Lakeland Highlands Rd and Edgewood. We pull out of the parking lot onto Lakeland Highlands Rd towards 540A. Toni decides to ask were we needed to go AFTER we were on Lakeland Highlands Rd. I said we need to go pay for the dogs rabies tags at Animal Control. Animal Control is on Winter Lake Rd by the dump. We decide that we will just continue on Lklnd. Highlands Rd to 540A and cut acroos to Bartow Rd to pick up Winter Lake. We literally ended up making a complete ginormous circle.

We made it to Animal Control around 3pm. The officer took the paperwork and told us that it would be $22. I went to pay with a Visa Debit card and THEY DON'T TAKE VISA!!! I mean seriously. They take Mastercard, Discover and Amex but not Visa!!! By this time it was pouring down rain. We run to the car and take off back down Winter Lake Rd to find an ATM. We hit the Citgo by PCC and the ATM is out of order (imagine that). The only other place with an ATM nearby is the 7-11 by my CHIRO's OFFICE (where we just came from). I attempt to use the ATM and the stupid thing won't read my card. I start bending it in half, trying to break it and stomp out of the store. It is still pouring and I am soaked from head to toe by the time I get back into the car. I start flipping out and using all of the profanity I can think of. It didn't help the situation but I felt better. I get Toni's card again and we decide we need a Snicker's bar because we all know that chocolate always helps in stressful situations. The ATM likes Toni's card but the piece of junk still doesn't work. It has a bunch of different options on the machine to pay bills, cash a check etc. but it froze when I tried to pull money out of the machine. I cancelled the transaction. I bought our Snicker's bars thinking I could get cash back. The attendant says yes you can get cash back but only $10!!! If you remember, I needed $22 for the tags. I was ridiculously frustrated by this time. She said that Winn Dixie (which was right across the parking lot) had an ATM. That ATM FINALLY worked. We headed back to Animal Control, 30 minutes later, and paid for the tags.

On our way home we decided to take the Polk Parkway. We were cruising along until we reached the toll booth. There were 3 lanes: SunPass, Exact Change and Change Provided. We only had a $1 and the toll was $.50. Imagine our surprise when the Change Provided lane was closed and we do not have a SunPass so we had to use the Exact Change line. The car in front of us didn't have $.50 either so she got out of her car and asked us for change. We told her we didn't have it either. I got out of the car and asked the toll booth attendant if she had change and she said for us to go on through. We are still waiting on our ticket in the mail.

I guess that we had enough put on us for one day so it was pretty normal.

Our lawn mower saga...

I bought a lawn mower in August of 2006 from Sears with a two year warranty (we will call it Cutty). As luck would have it, in September of 2008 Cutty died, one month AFTER the warranty expired!! We bought another mower about a week later from Sears with a two year warranty (we will call it Nipper). A week after we purchased Nipper we received a letter in the mail that stated we could renew our warranty on Cutty!! I had already used Nipper so I couldn't return him. We gave Cutty to Toni's dad so he could tinker with it. About a month after Nipper joined our family, I ran over a tree stump and screwed up his gas line. It was, of course, not covered on the warranty because it wasn't a manufacturer defect. I paid $168 for Nipper and the repairs were $138!!! CRAZY.

Yesterday, Toni and I left the house around 10:30 a.m. Nipper and the leaf blower were sitting under the carport as they have been for months. Toni's dad came over about 1 p.m. to borrow our shop vac. We returned home about 2 p.m. to find Nipper and blower gone. We assumed it was Toni's dad. I didn't think anything of it until I wanted to mow the backyard today. I called Toni's dad and asked if he had our mower. He said no and that it wasn't on the carport when he borrowed the shop vac. Nipper and blower were STOLEN IN BROAD DAYLIGHT!!! Cutty also sat there for TWO YEARS and nobody stole it. I know our economy sucks right now but really??

I have lived in this house for 9 years and I have never had anything stolen. I actually went to South Carolina for 4 days and came home to my door wide open (literally) and nothing was stolen. Now that our economy is all screwy people want to steal a freakin' push mower of all things. It's not even the self-propelled mower. I just don't get it. Believe me when we buy another mower I am bolting it either to the carport or to Sadie (our red-nosed pitbull). I don't think they will come back if they come in contact with her. hahaha

Saturday, June 21st

Yesterday was pretty normal until I woke up from my nap. I decided at 8pm to take a nap, yes 8pm and I woke up at 9:30. My sweetie pie woke me up with a kiss and drug me out of the room asking "can you help me with something?" All that was going through my mind was "what did she do?" Needless to say she set up a candlelight dance for us in the TV room. It was so sweet, until it was ruined by our dogs of course. While we were chit chatting and listened to music, we look through the baby gate and 3 of the 6 dogs are staring at us through the bars like they were in jail. It broke the mood. The next best thing was chocolate. We decided to go to Walmart for brownie sundae ingredients.

In process of enjoying our tastey sundaes, we hear a knock at the front door. We don't use the front door so we knew it wasn't someone we knew. The dogs didn't bark. Go figure. They bark when there isn't ANYBODY or ANYTHING around but when we need them to bark, they don't. I was the brave one and walked outside to see who the mystery person was that was knocking on the door. This woman, that looked vaguely familiar, was stumbing over to me. She started talking to me like I knew her but I didn't. After a few sentences of her story she decides to tell me who she is, my neighbor. Toni and I only talk to one of our neighbors because the other ones are strange. This was one of the strange neighbors. She was undoubtingly drunk. Her husband left to go to his moms house and took the keys to her car which was a good thing because she couldn't drive if she wanted to. She asked me to take her to the store. Being the nice trusting person that I am, I did.

She was super talkative and hilarious. On the way to the store I heard her life story. On the way home from the store, I heard her life story. When we returned home, I heard her life story. Toni didn't save me from the story telling. She talked to me for another hour. I managed to get her to stop talking for a second so I could slip in that I needed to get to bed. She went on her way but now I guess she thinks we are best buds.

I thought all of the surprises were over but she had another up her sleeve. I had changed into my PJ's and she knocked on the door AGAIN. And of course the dogs didn't bark. She came back over to give me her phone number. She was so drunk I couldn't even read what she wrote on the post it note. Toni and I laughed for a good 30 minutes after all of the hoopla.

Friday, June 19th

Since today is the my (our) first blog post I'm not really sure how this will go. I'm not great at sticking with things so we will see what the future holds for this blog.

I woke up around 10:30 yesterday to the bathroom rug drug out to the middle of the living room. It was torn to shreds. We did need a new rug however the dogs could have just TOLD us that instead of tearing it to pieces. I am guessing they were sick of waiting on me to wake up so they had to entertain themselves somehow. The brand new throw rug for the front door was also chewed on. Luckily you can't tell.

While hanging out in the TV room I heard a loud crash and I saw doggie feet straight up in the air. Braxton (all 85 pounds of him) was in his bed and the bed collapsed. It scared the pee out of him, literally. I put it back together and tightened the bolts but he has yet to return to the falling bed.

Toni and I didn't do much yesterday. We are old I guess. We drove around town looking for produce stands for the 3rd weekend in a row!! hahaha We were listening to the radio and every single song we heard was annoying. I really think we are becoming the cranky old couple of the neighborhood. We stopped at Big Lots and found quite a bit of cute items that we wanted. The clientele at the store was getting on our nerves so we left pretty quickly. We drove down 92 to Lakeland Highlands road, up South Florida and back to 92 to Nana's Kitchen for dinner. The crowd at Nana's was ridiculously old but the food was fantastic (again I think we are old).

On our way home we realized the dogs were left in the house with no lights on. We hurried home to find Riley out of the hallway. We have baby gates all over our house to keep dogs out of certain areas, however Riley is our climber/jumper/Houdini. We bought a gate to keep all of the dogs out of the TV room but he jumps over the gate so he can lie on the couch. He only does this when we are not home. We came up with the idea to stack two small baby gates in the hallway so he can't jump over them but now instead of jumping the gates he pushed them down. I think we will be fighting a never ending battle of "how can we outsmart the dogs."